Pirates of the Caribbean 2 (Gore Verbinski 2006)
Posted on July 30 at 15.34, 2006 by Eric Mahleb
The big Hollywood machine at its worse…Films as pure products, with only one and simple objective: generate as much revenue as possible.
Create characters that sell and appeal to the lowest possible common denominator, write a screenplay that makes absolutely no sense but results in a lot of idiotic situations, throw in some beautiful vistas and actors and you have a 1 billion dollars tridiogy that can unfortunately only reinforce the notion in Hollywood that this kind of crap is the future of cinema. Have i mentioned before that Jerry Bruckheimer is the lord Sauron of cinema (and Michael Bay his muppet Saruman. Or is Verbinski the new Saruman)? And the world’s teenage population (especially female) may think otherwise, but Johnny Depp is extremely annoying in this role.
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One Response to “Pirates of the Caribbean 2”
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Transformers - Quiet Please - Film reviews by Eric Mahleb Says:
September 21, 2007 at 9.02[...] So here I am, at this party in the Hollywood Hills, hanging out with my loser screenplay writer friend, when Michael Bay walks in with a girl around each arm. Out of all the parties in LA, Michael Bay has to walk into mine. Determined not to let it get to me, I undertake a precise and thorough strategy of avoidance, which works for most of the evening, until another loser friend of mine, this time a Foley operator, who mysteriously appears to know Bay, decides to introduce me to this evilest of all evil directors. Doing my best to hide my repulsion, I reluctantly shake the man’s hands and immediately start to feel nauseous all over, as if I had just put on the ring to rule them all, and had acquired the ability to see the darkness and shadows around me, or in this case, in front of me. And, clearly wanting my death, some guy who evidently exists on a different cinematic plane than I, barges in and exclaims some idiocy along the lines of ‘loved your Transformers Michael’, which naturally brings me closer to regurgitating my Shirataki noodles dinner. Not that I would mind plastering Michael Bay with some no-carb, no-fat vomit, but even Themis, the Greek Goddess of Justice, is not on my side this evening, and I must try to take consolation in the belief that, while slightly more successful than me, Michael Bay remains a cinematic barbarian with no appreciation of cinema as an art. [...]